Roderick straightened as he heard the door swing open. He smiled when he saw it was Viola. He took a small step back from the shop keeper laying at his feet.
“I know you have it. Give it to me or else!” He saw the fire in her amber eyes. Her tight-lipped smile distorted her ethereal face but put no fear in his heart. He found it almost comical that she stood posed ready to fire on him. He was too quick for that.
He laughed. “Or else? Really? You need me more than I need you, so please, tell me, what does this ‘or else’ entail?”
He knew he’d won when her smile faded. He watched her fondle the pendant around her neck. It had hurt him to destroy the beauty of such a magnificent piece. He took the small magnetic gear out of his pocket and tossed it into a box of similar gears equally distanced between them. He listened to the quiet clicks as the other gears connected through its magnetism.
“I knew you weren’t to be trusted.” Viola said. He watched her take a slow step towards the box. She was trying to be deceptive, but he loved this game. He saw her hand tremble slightly as it waited to grab the gun. He smelled her fear, watched as disgust danced across her face.
“I will have your piece when it’s all over. You know this.”
The brave tone of her voice made him smile again. He knew it was ghastly. It was effective. He disrespected her by throwing his head back and taking his eyes off her. He knew that she would feel every ounce of the disdain. It didn’t matter to him. He was stronger than her now and as time passed, he would only become stronger. He wanted to leave her with a reminder of his power.
“We shall see,” he said and leaped over the counter. His hand dived into the box and he filled his pocket. He looked at her once more before going out the door of the shop. “We shall see.”
One stride carried him past her to the door where he turned and tipped his hat to her and disappeared.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The prompt for this week is:
Let’s go shopping. You choose what kind of shopping, but you must involve 2 characters on the trip, and there must be a conflict of some kind (not necessarily between those 2 characters). Write a paragraph from the point of one character, then write the same interaction from another character’s point of view.
You don’t need back story in this one. Just put us in the scene and go from there. Keep it tight and concise, and 500 words for each character.
You can find Viola’s POV here.
I always appreciate and welcome feedback. Feel free to share your thoughts in a comment. Thanks for stopping by!
SAM is a 40 something aspiring author with a trunk full of tricks thanks to a checkered past. She haunts tropical islands in her dreams while living the reality of a Central East Coast existence as a mom, a wife, a coach, a teacher, a maid, a chauffeur, a woman, and a survivor.
[...] kept up with the story? No worries. You can find the newest pieces and meet Viola just by clicking [...]
Interesting prompt and you did well here. I’d say both POV’s have their strengths, but agree that Viola is more – POW! –
Really? Viola’s POV was scattered. I’m not sure I even kept it in her POV the whole time. LOL. She is definitely a strong character though. She’s easy to have a love/hate relationship with.
I agree w Carrie word for word. Viola has the strongest voice.
this part is much stronger than the POV from Viola. That’s telling
If you aren’t sure what POV you should take in a scene, write it from someone else’s!
I could feel the tension better, sense his evil nature by the way he thought of Viola. He is a fabulous bad guy!
Yes. It made me realize I need to redo the Viola POV so its all her. It would take a few subtle changes, but I think this one is the one that will go in the story.
[...] (PS. There is a reversed angle to this story from Roderick’s point of view if you click here.) [...]